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I've Just Met a Girl Named Ororo...
Written on 2002-05-15, at 9:28 p.m.
dizboy's disturbing daily diet...

1 Bally's Breakfast Bar

1 Chicken Pot Pie

1 Side Macaroni and Cheese

1 Side Corn

3 10oz. Apple Juice

1 Carnation Instant Breakfast

1 Bag Ruffles

1/2 Bag Popcorn

2 1/4 Pound Double Stacks with Cheese

John Live*

Look, look...Not even my wife beater can hold back my new rippling muscles!

*Not at all live

My life is closing in around me.

Don't worry, I don't mean it in that "I'm about to break into a movie-of-the-week soliloquy".

I mean it quite literally.

You see, I've found that I can live my entire life in a three or four mile radius without ever missing a thing.

Here's how I see it...

Within a mile of my apartment are:

Universal Studios Florida, Bally's, Every single fast food franchise, Most all known table service restaurants, two supermarkets, four pharmacies, seven gas stations, and a Blockbuster.

By October there will be a new mega-mall about 1/4 mile from my door, complete with a Neiman-Marcus, Macy's, and a Cheesecake Factory.

Within four miles, there are three movie megaplexes with a combined total of seventy-two movie screens, and one IMAX screen.

Having all these things available to me within my little microcosm has made it totally unnecessary for me to have any type of dealings with the world outside of my four-mile sphere of interest.

Whether or not this is a good thing is yet to be determined.

Only in a Theme Park.

Only at my job, rather...

Today, I had a meeting called "Pyro 101".

This meeting was set up to give our team a crash course on fireworks, and other pyrotechnics which we use in the Parks.

I learned a many things which I did not know, like what exactly goes into fireworks shows, and just how they make everything timed just right so that the music goes with the booms (It's actually very simple).

Later on in the day, I took a group of the Marvel Comics characters over to the Loews Cineplex for a private screening of Spider-Man, thrown by our Marketing department.

Now, I don't know if anyone who reads me works in Marketing, or has friends in marketing, but...

These sons-of-bitches...

Well, that's a little harsh, I know a lot of nice Marketers. But many of the Marketing and Sales people we work with just rub me the wrong way.

The actual event was fairly bumpy, the culmination of which happened when the war of the nerds began.

I'll explain.

As most of you know, Star Wars: Episode II opens tomorrow.

In Orlando, most of the bigger theaters are having the first showing at 12:01am, to appease the light saber wielding, dateless masses.

Here's what happened.

We're taking the group of Super-Heroes (Storm, Wolverine, Captain America, Spider-Man, Green Goblin, and Dr. Doom) to the theater through the elevator...

The bell dings, the doors open, and we're facing a group of heavily armed, pearly white Storm Troopers.

The moment is thick with tension, and it takes more than a few moments for the surrealism of this meeting to fade, and for us to realize that the high powered lasers pointed at us are truly nothing more than a plastic gun modified late one night while posting messages like "Top Ten Reasons I Should Have Played Anakin" on TheForce.Net.

I honestly thought for a moment that I was about to be treated to the coolest version of West Side Story ever.

But alas, my hopes of Wolverine belting out a love ballad to Amidala were dashed when the situation quickly disintegrated to mere dirty looks.

Well, I can only asssume it was a dirty look...

You know...Storm Trooper helmets.

Be well...


Your Host and Emcee...dizboy.

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