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Do I really "Gotta Have Friends"?
Written on 2001-09-01, at 10:42 p.m.
dizboy's disturbing daily diet...

1/4 Chicken

1 Mashed Potatoes

1 Salad

1 Sweet Tea.

Shut up Steve.


There are some diaries that I get very excited about when I see that they have updated. Well, not really EXCITED!!!, but I look forward to reading them.

Which makes me think, "I wonder if there are people who look forward to reading me."

Then I figure, "Well, there's got to be at least one or two, I have 29 that list me as a favorite..."

And that just puts a whole new level of pressure on me.

You Bastards.


Sometimes, when I'm at home, all alone (of course I'm all alone, I live by myself.), I do things like someone is watching.

You know, sort of like I'm on "The Real World", or "Big Brother".

Like, I'll walk around, making really big gestures, and sitting really sexy-like on the couch.

And when I sleep, I'll position the covers in a very risque pose, so that the cameras which are not there can catch me looking all hot and showing some skin.

Wow, I need more friends.


So, last night....Margaret Cho.

The Cho.

C-H-O.

WOW.

I laughed so hard I needed an adult diaper.

I highly recommend going to see her show if she'll be anywhere near you on the tour...

She does all brand new material, and it's wet-yourself-funny. (See above)


FRIEND after the show: Hey, where's the closest IHOP?

ME: There's one on Kirkman, by the Radisson hotel, just past Vineland.

FRIEND: Ok, yeah, the one right past Vineland, right?

ME: Yeah, just past Vineland, I'll meet you guys there.

ME (On Cell phone, after waiting 20 minutes.): Um, where are you guys?

FRIEND: We're here, where are you?

ME: Um, at IHOP. (I say "Um" a lot)

FRIEND: The one by the Radisson?

ME: Yes, the one by the Radisson.

FRIEND: (Silence) OH! I meant the one by the SHERATON!

ME: The one by the Sheraton, just past Vineland Road?

Friend: Vineland, what? No.

ME: Goodbye.

Ok, maybe I DON'T need more friends.

Be well...

-JOHN-


Your Host and Emcee...dizboy.

Prodigal Son - 11:03 pm , 11.20.06

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A Pop Culture Case Study - 9:24 pm , 08.26.04


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